My journey as “kitchen witch” really began as a child. I would conjure up food for our cats in the backyard using hose water, Meow Mix, and typically whatever flowers I could find in the garden and then I would attempt to feed it to them in between the Magic School classes I was running out of the shed in our backyard. It was all very sophisticated. 

Around that same time, I would also help Mae (Thai for mother) cook for large groups of folks at our congregation, the emergency department where she worked, and whosever birthday it was at the Naval hospital that week. Occasionally, I would also help Pops bake a cake or make pancakes. There was a lot going on in our kitchen growing up. I have fond memories of sitting on the floor making Thai food with our hands, reading out of a Betty Crocker cookbook while Mae threw ingredients in disregarding the measurements, and gathering in there for parties, oftentimes with multiple languages being spoken simultaneously and my brain lighting up with all the excitement. 

Now, I use those skills in a myriad of ways, mostly cooking for groups of volunteers at Warrior Heart Ranch with HeatherAsh Amara, cooking for apprentices and questers in the wilderness or at a retreat center, and teaching anyone who asks how I prepared my latest meal using intuition, my senses, and curiosity. 

Right now, I’m moving my blog focus to talk about cooking as ritual and for the foreseeable future, it will be focused on how to use cooking to support the physical form in healing from an environment of stress, overwhelm, anxiety, and an overproduction of yeast–leading to inflammation. I’m so glad you are here and hope you find some of the stories ahead inspiring. 


 

As we entered the new year, I was filled with anticipation around how I wanted to feel in 2017.

I followed the same magical process I did at this time last year:

:: setting intentions and action plans

:: cleaning out my closet

:: filling out my new planner

:: lighting candles every day while making a wish or prayer

. . .and identifying my Core Desired Feelings. 

As I wrote the words, I was so excited to be inviting them into my life: Shakti, magical, daring, volcanic, and integrity.

Yet, there we were, over a month of the way into 2017 and I wanted to hide under a rock. (It wasn’t until this week and the Spring Equinox that I really began to feel into the intentions I set.)

Instead, I haVE been feeling the attacks on the divine feminine and the Divine Mother and I am outraged.

For the first quarter of this year, I was simultaneously paralyzed with hopelessness and despair. How can this be happening? 

Then a friend invited me to re-examine my Core Desired Feelings, “Is that not what you are feeling?” she asked.

I took a step back and suspended my judgement for a moment—suspended my assumptions. SHAKTI. MAGICAL. DARING. VOLCANIC. INTEGRITY.

She was correct. I am feeling those things, they simply aren’t what I imagined they would look like. These feelings are showing up in the way they amalgamate together. They are fiery and transformative. They also dance with the darkness. There is this nuanced experience about them that I had so conveniently forgotten. The universe was asking me to face the barriers I had in my life via my Core Desired Feelings. It was asking me not to make assumptions and consider the lessons that lay before me. . .the firewalks that lay ahead. It was beckoning me to face my fears around the messiness of being human and walking the warrior goddess way. 

What I am experiencing is not unlike what many other people are experiencing around the world. This is not about the election or the new president or anything in particular. This is about the consistent string of wounded energy from all sides.

We are bombarded every day with streams of hate, division, and struggle. We are faced with the unraveling of humanity. We are experiencing the rising of the collective oil. 

The collective oil is the gunk of things that have been lying dormant. It is the darkness we pretend does not exist in the world. It is covered by plastic smiles of positivity and washed out by fads of “just get over it” and “everything will be alright” with sprinkles of “just love and light”. It’s the spiritual bypassing. In the trenches of each of our souls is the stuff we are ashamed of. It is the playground of our inner judge and victim. Over time, it festers and grows. It continues to collect until we can no longer stand it. HeatherAsh tells a story of a pan of oil. Typically, we refer to this as an individual experience, however as we can see around us, there is also a collective one.

As we begin to find our warrior goddess way, we can imagine pure water flowing into our individual containers and this is exactly what we need to do as a collective community now. 

Consider this an invitation to face your firewalks. An invitation to see what assumptions you (or we as humans) are holding onto about the barriers before us. An invitation to acknowledge the running gremlin tapes of stories we have made up to put up blocks in our own way. Consider this an invitation to suspend your own worldview, even if just for a moment, to see the humanity in us all—the messiness of fear, love, and passion that drives each of us. It is all energy and at the end of the day, that is all there is. We can use that energy to drive us forward and to raise us up so we will rise from the ashes. You can use the energy to create change in your own life. 

It is so frequently forgotten that the elements are our allies, that we can seek solace in them and combine our energy with theirs. I’ve compiled a list of ways to use the elements as allies in our daily lives so that we can prepare for the journey within ourselves and also for the one out into our community to take inspired action in these turbulent times.

 

Here is a short guide on how to breathe some space back into your world and to lighten the weight of the world:

Move. Each day allow your body to experience a range of motion, whether that is stretching, yoga, running, swimming, dancing, etc. Getting into your body is a great way to get out of your head and the stories we tell ourselves. Touch your feet to the earth, feel the air as you run or walk, dive into the water, and feel the burn as you move. Allow yourself to commune with the elements in whatever way feels playful and good. 

Hydrate. Drink lots of water to nourish your cells. Our cells are waiting to carrying life deep into our bodies to awaken the wisdom that lies within. Acknowledging Grandmother Ice (Water) while you are drinking her can even deeper your relationship with this nourishing source being. 

Get Still. Take time to be still and quiet. Sometimes, having the world in our palms is overwhelming and noisy. Give yourself permission to put down your phone, shut down your computer, close your eyes, and open your intuition. Doing this outside on the ground is a special way to connect with Mother Earth. Open yourself to her wisdom. Listen to the wind as you sit still. What messages does it have for you? Feel the sun on your bare skin. What does Grandfather Fire want to say as you bask in his sunshine?

Forgive. Finally, invite yourself to find forgiveness to all that is hurting. In Warrior Goddess Way, HeatherAsh talks about the wisdom of forgiveness. She describes big forgiveness and small forgiveness. It can be freeing to use the element of water to help you through this process. Allow her to wash away that which is hurting, holding you down, and keeping you in the swamplands of despair. Anytime you wash your hands or shower or clean the house, imagine the water is washing away all the areas where forgiveness is ripe in you. And for all those places you aren’t ready for yet? Love them fiercely for they are trying to keep you safe. 

These tips are what keep me grounded and open during these times of uncertainty and chaos.

It is my wish that as this collective oil rises we honor it by continuing to lean into the discomfort of this courageous, daring work.

We are on this path together and if we can each hold onto the humanity in ourselves by practicing forgiveness and loving everything with our whole heart, perhaps we have a chance of getting this collective oil to continue pouring out to purify our vessel so we can heal our planet and support the divine feminine as she nourishes all of us.

With all my love, 

Sarina

Greetings Magical Ones!

I would like to share a dream that came through during our Magic Messages workshop yesterday. . .
The Dragon’s Well

A maiden sorceress appears and I enter a portal into the Dragon’s Well. There is a deep, enchanted pool of water guarded by a merdragon. She is stunning. Her bluish green scales are almost iridescent. There are hints of sea foam and indigo dancing on her body. She stands so tall. I feel small next to her and yet equal in partnership. She ushers me forward and shows me how to drink from the well. I cup my hands in front of me and lower them. As the water begins to fill them, I sense its power. I raise my hands up and the water meets my lips. The water is almost sweet. It’s refreshing and life giving. As I continue to take in the water, I feel the oil rise. . .my stale, old emotions and agreements begin floating up. I sense the knee-jerk reaction to close off to them–to push them down. I take a deep breath and drink some more. I feel the oil rise higher. I allow it to begin flowing out. I cry. I allow all that needs to come up to do so. When I feel this part is complete, I take out a container from my satchel and fill it with the well water. I thank the merdragon, Lady Luna Isabella. I look up and see Peacock has joined me. She is ready to take me back to where I came from. It’s time to return from this dream. I bid Lady Luna farewell and hop on Peacock’s back.

This dream was like that water. It poured so much life into my well and it also brought up the death. It brought up the things that were ready to surrender to my inner fire.

It feels so good to stay open and to invite in the death part of the Life/Death/Life cycle.

Now, I do not mean at first. It takes some practice to undo all the teachings we’ve taken on and digested about closing off to “negative” emotions. Here’s the truth, there are no negative emotions. There are just feelings and the stories we wrap around them. The negative part is really just the energy behind our stories are draining us versus empowering us.

As Lady Luna Isabella pointed out in my dream, if we drink of the well–if we pour clean, pure water into our souls, the gunky stuff will come up. It’s one of the core lessons of Warrior Goddess path. I even revisit this teaching during each of my classes. Oftentimes it is also what we have labeled as being bad. They are the uncomfortable feelings. Perhaps the ones we’ve even labeled as darkness. This is all an illusion. Everything is just energy. Everything is a reflection of light. We have to be willing to see it though. We need to choose to breathe through those really uncomfy places.

I’m going to tell you one more story. . .

So yesterday I had the privilege of being able to follow these Warrior Goddess Training teachings (the ones I just finished teaching a six week course on) in a moment of. . .tension. Someone was having some anger move through them. They snapped and I immediately felt the tug to try and fix it. I asked what was wrong, then they closed off. I felt myself try to fix it. The pleaser in me begging to let her try to fix this. I took a deep breath. I felt the tears welling up inside me. I removed myself from the situation and went to a safe place. I let the tears come up. I allowed the oil to pour out. Even though I knew I didn’t have time before heading off to co-facilitate our Magic Messages workshop, I chose to give myself three minutes to let whatever was coming up to come up. And up it came! My judge was having a field day. She wore her extra sassy stilettos and power suit. All these agreements started flooding in. I kept breathing. I kept crying. I let it all up. My breath helped keep me center. My tears kept things flowing. I then grabbed a notebook, jotted everything down, and headed out the door.

It was so fluid. So cathartic. I allowed myself the three minutes, then honored the transition I needed to make. I cried the whole way to the workshop. Then, as I arrived at the teaching location, I switched roles. I breathed life into my role as facilitator and used the energy from my emotions to teach and facilitate. I was transparent about what was going on and it helped deepen our lesson about creative energy and shamanic dream work. I love that my job allows me to do this. I talked about how everything is energy. It is my energy. It is of me and I can direct it where I need to go. I can create because of it and with its help art manifests through me. I can be the channel for this magic and that’s exactly what we did during the workshop.

The lesson here? Allow it all to come up. Just breathe through it. Keep steady. Fall apart. It’s all magical in its own right.

Your own power animals and guides are there to usher you into the discomfort. They are there to support you fully as you dig into the darkness. They will help you through it. If you ask, they will show you the tools to use and the way to go. Trust them. Trust yourself. It’s all the same. Go inside yourself. The answers are there.

Finally, allow the layers to peel away. It’s a messy, lovely process. The element of fire will burn those layers away and water will wash away any debris.

Drink from the well.

Breathe.

Believe.

With enchanted well water,

Your Creative Priestess

P.S. If you want to join my new Facebook group + book club. . .enter the portal here!

Why hello new moon in Sagittarius!

You want to bring up all the stuff that is ready to die off?

AND. . .you want me to set intentions for the new year and trust everything is going to be OK when I let go of all the comfy crap I’ve been holding on to for the last 2-3 years. . .

Hell yes? <insert scared to death unsure voice>

That was basically my experience this week. Actually, it was pretty much my experience this entire year. This year was filled with shedding layers, daring myself to go deeper, surrendering to the contractions, surrendering to the flow, and overall just opening myself up to wherever the universe nudged me to go. You know what the result was? A life I love!

I’m not going to tell you everything is rainbows and unicorns all the time, it certainly isn’t (but when it is it’s SUPER extra fun). I have days where I don’t want to get out of bed or when I’m resentful of all the deep work I’m doing. That’s part of life though. It’s part of death too! Looking at the natural cycles that occur around us, we can see that everything has a life/death/life cycle . The “trick” to loving your life, is being able to acknowledge that even when times are crunchy and you are struggling to get through the day, you have a choice. You can choose to complain or suffer or you can accept that it is what is happening and just witness it. You don’t have to judge it or victimize it. It simply can just. . . be.

One of the gifts of this new moon in Sagittarius is that us Sags love adventure and planning BIG things. We take risks all the time and don’t think anything of it. We are the ones who shoot our arrows and then head in that direction, yet when we decide it’s not the right path, we can shoot another arrow up and reset our course. We do not see the detour as time wasted, but instead as lessons and teachings to help us along the way. This new moon brings with it that energy. Sags also tend to get sort of “up in the clouds” from time to time, which means letting go of our past, comfy places and soaring in uncharted ground. . . er. . . .air. During the next couple of days, I encourage you to look for areas in your life that do not bring you joy or fulfillment. What about it is unsatisfying? How can you identify your desires and then map a course to go after them? What will it take for you to let go of the ground and leap into the unknown of your deepest desires while trusting the universe is ultimately supporting you?

Here are some of the ways I’m asking the universe for support and letting her know I’m ready to further embrace my life from my core-desired feelings: Yesterday I crafted my vision board + intention map for the new year. It is filled with all sorts of magic, desire, and adventure. I’m really looking forward to 2016.

 

 

Today I built my new moon/birthday altar.

I invite you to plant your seeds of intention today and remind yourself to honor the endings in your life as much as you celebrate the beginnings. It’s not as hard as you make it out to be, I promise.

For further readings related to this post:

The life/death/life cycle

Women Who Run with the Wolves, Chapter 5, Hunting:When the Heart Is a Lonely Hunter

By: Clarissa Pinkola Estes

Transformation

The Toltec Path of Transformation: Embracing the Four Elements of Change

By HeatherAsh Amara

The Desire Map: a guide to creating goals with soul

New Moon in Sagittarius

The Astro Twins

Mystic Mamma

Chani Nicholas

Kate Rose (Elephant Journal)

Until next time. . .

In sweet surrender and epic dreaming,

Sarina the Creative Priestess

Merry Day of Thanks from The United States!

I have been up for a few hours now and already started cooking for the days ahead. I have some chicken in the oven, cranberries simmering, and soon will be baking a “processed free” pumpkin pie. Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday, not because of the history of the holiday, but because it is a time to come together and express gratitude. Earlier this year, I began expressing gratitude in several ways and it has truly changed my life.

Around that time Rabbit started showing up in my dreams and as I began to get to know Rabbit, it showed me the beauty of those dark holes and listening to my inner knowledge. I found that as I explored the “rabbit holes” of my life, areas that were ready to be let go of had light shined on them, especially during the full moon. We are currently in a full moon and so much has had it’s light shined on these past few weeks. I know that as we move from autumn into winter it is the time to let those things die off and make way for the new. The full moon is a great time for those types of clearings and it is exceptional that this year Thanksgiving falls on the Mourning Moon. I invite you to take some time to consider what is ready to die off in your life. Are you able to thank it for it’s service and let it go? Can you welcome in the mourning period this winter? I have found that finding the peace to let things go that no longer serve or align with you is the bedrock of creating joy and abundance in your life. Additionally, expressing gratitude solidifies the experience by taking you deeper into connection with yourself and the magic of the universe.

Here are some ways you can express gratitude this holiday season:

1.) Create a gratitude jar or journal. It doesn’t take much, but all you do is get a container (I used a clay jar from Mexico which was a gift from my “Aunt” Tracy) or a blank journal and put what you are grateful for on a piece of paper. For example, “I am grateful for when we sat around the fireplace talking about our deepest desires” or “the woman who let me go ahead of her in line” or “that _______ I had been wishing for.” I invite you to give it a try and see what magic comes of it!

2.) Hand written letters. I started a practice of giving random cards of kindness and hand written letters to loved ones to express gratitude and reconnect. It creates ritual in your life around maintaining those deep connections through shared experience.

3.) Letting go of thing that no longer serve you.This way of expressing gratitude may be a bit more subtle, however it can create spaciousness in your life and really honor what you have received in the past. I have found through sorting books and purging my closet of anything that didn’t feel good that we hold onto things because they used to be aligned with a role or phase of our lives. Oftentimes, we hold onto those things for much longer than they really apply. At some point, they stopped aligning with our lives, but we felt compelled to hold on. I’m telling you it can feel SO GOOD to let it go. The way I practice this, is by thanking the item for serving me during __________ period of my life or for ______ role and letting it know that it no longer aligns with my life and so I am sending it to a new forever home. You do not need to know why you held onto it or even how it had served you, but just acknowledging it honor it. I then collect all the items and take them to a donation spot that helps charities or even the people I serve in the non-profit I work for.

4.) Give yourself permission to not be involved in dysfunctional family dynamics. When you choose not to numb in the face of fear of not having the “perfect” family holiday experience it can be truly freeing. In addition, it is a way to express gratitude to yourself for choosing not to abandon your authentic self and accepting your loved ones in all their glory and messiness. This one is probably the most difficult because it often times involves unraveling from years of shared family agreements, but I will tell you it is possible. Anytime you begin to sense that “craziness” rise up from the stress of family dynamics, ask yourself how you can step back and witness instead of control, distract, isolate, and please (inspired by Warrior Goddess Training by HeatherAsh Amara). If you find yourself setting those clear boundaries even when scared to death, thank yourself for staying true and having courage.

My wish to you is that you can find peace and joy this holiday season.

With sparkles and light,

Sarina

WOW. What a powerful weekend I just experienced. I joined about sixty other Warrior Goddesses for Warrior Goddess Wisdom Weekend with my teacher, HealtherAsh Amara. It was actually my second time attending, but it was VERY different from the one I attended in March. The first time, I was brand new to the Warrior Goddess path. I had no idea where I was going or even where I was. The first Warrior Goddess Wisdom Weekend gave me a taste of what I could be like all the time if only I chose to forgive myself for getting lost along the way. It was my first experience with a fire walk and opening the container of transformation that was burning inside me to tend to.I began remembering who I was before the world told me who I need to be.

This past weekend was very different because I had spent the last 6 months actually adopting the tools from Warrior Goddess Training into my daily life. I found myself shedding agreements that do not serve me and planting the seeds for my future in a very different way than before. I set my intent for the weekend “WILD”–I want to remember what it was like to feel untamed and free of the agreements I took on that are not my own. . .I set my intention and then let it work it’s magic. I caught myself throughout the weekend, feeling disappointed that things were not like they were last time and that was extremely difficult to swallow. I reflected on, OK this is a mirror, I am looking at–oh, I’m looking at myself from 7 months ago. I have shifted so much from then that of course things couldn’t be the same as last time. I’m in the darkness now. . .I’m sifting through the closet of old agreements and sorting the items so I can move through this process. How eye-opening it is when we take a step back and look at where we’ve come from. Then, I took a step further back and looked where I was only three years ago.  I was in one of the darkest periods of my life, flailing and feeling wave after wave hit me until I just couldn’t take anymore. I realized, wow, I have expanded. I have gone deeper. With each level of transformation, I feel the lightness and the power around letting go of what I no longer need outside, because I have found it within. What a sense of freedom! That’s when I realized my intent was not to find the wildness this weekend, it was to recognize it. I am already on the path of the wild woman. I struggled to see it, because right now, there is so much moving through me I hadn’t stopped to breathe. To take it all in. To be gentle and compassionate for myself in the darkness. To remember, I am the darkness and the light. I am everything I need.

It is my wish that anyone that feels called to the Warrior Goddess Tribe will find us and know that this is possible for them too. We are constantly in a spiral of learning. I know that I will continue to have these big shifts and that I will be OK leaning into the discomfort. I know that with each step on this path I will stray from time to time or go so deep into the darkness that I forget I’m still on it. The beauty of the darkness is knowing the moon is still there, I just may not be able to see it, but if I breathe in deep and howl from my core, I will remember I am already home.

As adults, many of us have forgotten how to play. We forget the very essence of what makes us joyful human beings. I am a self-described play “activist.” I encourage others to play as often as possible and I live my life in a way that encourages play with those around me. What I have found since I started this work is that often times, people just want or need someone to give them permission. They want to know it is going to be OK. You see, our egos are the reason playfulness gets buried. As we grow up, we become self-conscious and others tell us that we “need to grow up.” This in turn, leads us to believe play is only for children and therefore we no longer get to engage in those playful activities unless we want to be ridiculed and face our greatest fears from the sandbox.

What an awful experience, right? No wonder we no longer want to play!The ego tends to get blamed for things like this, but we have to remember that it’s only trying to protect us. The ego wants to be sure we are safe. It is there is keep us from harm and everything is does is from the essence of. . . will we be OK if I do _____?

Recently, I attended my first dream retreat. It was hosted by Chrysalis Healing Arts. During the retreat, we had several activities that involved playing, especially in our guided dream journeys, but my FAVORITE one was where we shared our dreams and chose one to re-enact through dream theater. Yes. DREAM THEATER. We each had a role (or three) and acted out the dream as a team. It was so much fun! Additionally, it allowed the dreamer (who also directed) to further analyze and decode the dream based on our interpretation as characters. We were able to help the dreamer journey back to the sacred dreamland and get more information about what was beneath the surface.

What that activity allowed us to do, was get permission from the universe to play again. I mean, we truly embodied our characters. We laughed. We played. The energy was so intense and it was then that I realized even with my weekly play practices, I REALLY miss doing deep play work, like theater. I miss my drama club days and playing out in the desert dunes as a young child creating fortresses out of mesquite trees. One of the other things that was really fun during the retreat is that I chose to sleep on a bunk bed on the loft part of the Crescent Moon Lodge. Talk about getting in touch with my playful side! Not only that, but I turned it into a fort. It took me back to the days of turning our dining room table and dining room into a castle using pillows, blankets, and chairs. it was SO fun. I like to think it also encouraged some really fun dreams. Anyway, I think I even asked someone’s permission to do so and then thought, I’m an adult, I can build a fort if I want to!

Both these activities really showed me how engrained it is to ask for permission even as adults. At work, at home, of our friends, etc. we ask for permission/approval. As part of Warrior Goddess Training I am facing my fears and learning to love them, so I’m giving myself permission to love my ego, greet fear as a friend, and create space for play in my life. I learned to do “permission slips” from an Oprah Life Class by Brene Brown on The Gifts of Imperfection. I found that when I meditated a bit, it helped silence what my brain wanted me to write down and dug a little deeper to what my soul really NEEDED to have permission to do to live more authentically.

I invite you to create some permission slips you can refer to over the next few days, weeks, or even months. I have some in my art journal, but I’m making more to hang up around my office and the home. Here are some examples:

I give myself permission to:

. . . take the vacation time I’ve earned at work.

. . .make working out a priority at least 3 days a week.

. . .be honest and kind.

. . .ask for what I need.

. . .be fiercely loved.

. . .create space for play every day.

Grab a sheet a paper, a notebook, poster board, or some canvas (any surface really) and craft some permission slips. Feel free to share them on the Creative Harz Facebook page!

Here’s to finding permission to do what we need to foster play in our lives!

With glitter and gratitude,

Sarina

 
 

My little Prince of Darkness, Anakin Lucas Harz, turns TWO today! How can this be?! It feels like only yesterday I was picking him up from his foster home to prevent him from being returned to the feral colony. He has taught me a lot in the last two years, mostly about the importance of play, rest, and nourishment. Ani spends a good 80% of his day sleeping and nourishing his body. The other 20% is spent playing. That’s all you really need in life, right? Right. . .well, mostly. . .here is a lesson I’m teaching Ani and it has been a mirror for me to learn from as well.

Lesson: Storytelling

I am a GREAT storyteller. I like to think my imagination has been thriving since I was just an infant. I’ve been obsessed with fantasy and science fiction from a very young age. I used to play with our eight cats out in the desert until sun down and climb trees and sand dunes in search for adventure. The nurturing of my creative spirit and imagination has served me well in my career as a social worker as well. I have often thought outside of the box to help my clients and now in fundraising I have continued to strengthen my critical thinking skills with a heaping scoop of creativity.

I even love to story tell in my groups of friends. I find myself sharing my dreams and stories about the week with enthusiasm and a certain fierceness. I get REALLY excited about walking people through an experience I had. Even my weekly therapy sessions are fun because I look forward to it like a child getting ready for story time. I am eager to share with my therapist how I’m working on this chapter of my life and what things I have identified as not serving me, for which I have “turned the page” and have committed to not looking back.

These stories–these narratives–are what make up our lives. they are the web we weave. We create the narratives based on our experiences and our perceptions of others. Sometimes the narratives feed our soul and often times they have the ability to cripple us.

So, let’s talk about the dark side of story telling. . .how about those stories we make up when we take things personally or have a past trauma or experience that leaves us feeling anxious and disconnected? Those are the times when storytelling can be quite scary. I know I made up stories when I’m feeling disconnected or threatened. My ego is really good at letting fear flood in and take the reigns while my spirit is trying to hold up her own and flood my system with peace and love. Anakin also experiences this I think. He’s never been officially diagnosed with anxiety, but I imagine since he was the runt of his litter and then “rescued” by a woman and taken to a house with lots of other cats much bigger than him, that the first month of his life was pretty traumatic. It took me WEEKS to get him to trust going outside the bathroom. He used to pee on himself if he got scared. Now, most of that has been resolved, but he is still nervous and runs at the hint of any new sounds–this is where the storytelling comes in. I imagine that he has a similar response to me when I get triggered and start to make up a story. I get paralyzed and overwhelmed. I don’t know how to stop the flood of panic. . .

Well, that was until I started practicing what I like to call the “Bookshelf Approach.” The Bookshelf Approach is when I (with myself or a friend) go through and decide which “books” (stories) need to go back on the shelf.

Step 1: Recognize or become aware that there is a story happening

Step 2: Remain calm and DO NOT PANIC. Take some deep breaths.

Step 3: Consider whether this book is feeding love or feeding fear

Step 4: If it is feeding fear, say out loud “it’s time for you to go back on the shelf.”

Step 5: Thank fear for trying to protect me and assure it I am safe and not being chased by a lion.

Step 6: Start fresh with facts.

These steps although simple can have life shifting effects. I am so grateful that I have learned how to put certain stories back up and thank them. That is the cornerstone of loving darkness I think–thank it for being part of what makes you. . . well, YOU.

Starting tomorrow, I will be joining a group of people in one of the scariest emotional challenge I think was ever thought up. I am so pumped about it though! Jordanna Eyre, Chief Sorceress at Modern Day Sorcerer, is launching the Embrace Your Darkness challenge. This five day challenge is FREE and it will be packed full of ways for you to embrace the parts of yourself that are a little messy or a hot mess! Join us to learn more about those parts of yourself that lurk in the shadows. Let’s learn how to love all parts of ourselves, including the moments we want to make up a whole library full of illusions.

With glitter and gratitude,

Sarina